I am not good at representational art. I am not great at quickly packing a suitcase. I cannot whistle. I once thought I was average. I once thought I was not good at many things. I once was afraid to say that I smart. Then I met a name named Martin duMaat.

I took acting and improvisation classes and lessons my last year of college, and for a few years after I moved to Chicago. I studied with Marty at Second City in an Improv for Actors class. One of the most important things I learned from him was compassion, and to own who and what I am. He told me to play to the top of my intelligence, and then he continually challenged me to do so.

I was challenged to play an abusive mother – and I was surprised when I did it well. I was asked to play a girl who watched her boyfriend commit suicide. And I did it well. I was then given the role of a not so bright waitress. I did NOT do well. Turns out, I made her too “not so bright”. It wasn’t real. It wasn’t true.

We all have strengths, skills and moments of genius. When I allowed the abusive mother to cause pain out of a need to protect, she was real. And when the girl watched her boyfriend die so that she would not, she became real. The waitress? When she realized her amazing short term memory allowed her to wait tables without having to write anything down, she lived through me. And I learned to live.

Each of these characters needed me to allow them to the best of what they could be – to play to the top of their abilities. And my life needs me to do the same.

So, I am not good at representational art, but I will draw you a very silly cat or pig if need be. I am not great a packing a suitcase quickly, but I will throw stuff in a bag and live the results to get where I need to be in time. I cannot whistle, but I will never quit trying. Maybe one day my “top” will allow me a short tune in Marty’s honor.